‘To become a person does not necessarily mean to be well adjusted, well adapted, approved of by others. It means to become who you are. We are meant to become more eccentric, more peculiar, more odd. We are not meant just to fit in. We are here to be different. We are here to be the individual.’
– James Hollis
Through the Dark Wood: Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life
‘Love in such a way that the person you love feels free.’
– Thich Nhat Hanh
Therapy with Ben Gold
I am an experienced mentor and coach, approachable and easy to talk to. I have over twelve years’ experience working with individuals and couples, helping them explore the challenges that happen in everyday life. My passion is supporting parents in becoming more ‘hands off’ allowing their children to become strong minded, empowered individuals, preparing them for their eventual flight from the nest into the modern world that we now exist in.
I run activity weekends for fathers and their children and ongoing parenting groups. I have extensive experience working with men as a leader with The Mankind Project, a worldwide organisation that supports men in their ongoing personal development. I was a trustee and key member of the team which formed JourneyMan UK, a registered offering mentoring to teenage boys.
I am a father of two, Jasper 25 and Evie 21. I have completed two years of psychotherapy training at Spectrum, The Centre for Humanistic Psychology in North London, starting in 2004. I am currently completing my training at Metanoia to become accredited with UKCP as a Person Centred Psychotherapist. I have trained both with The Parent Coaching Company and as an Anger Management coach with the British Association of Anger Management.
I have also worked as an IT professional for over thirty years and this provides me with a good appreciation of the challenges that can face us when balancing a professional and home life.
Working with parents
For parenting support, my work with you is as much about focussing on the behaviour of the child as it is looking at how we, as parents, respond, communicate and set boundaries with our children. I believe that it is only when both of these parts are worked on together that it is possible to achieve respectful and trusting relationships in the family.
Some of my biggest challenges have been as a result of being a father of two children. I now know that our children are our ‘teachers’, exquisitely designed to press our buttons and to provide us with opportunity after opportunity to discover more about ourselves. When I am able to respond to these moments with consideration and self-reflection, with support, then I am able to grow that little bit more into being my mature adult.
Working with men
As a leader with The Mankind Project and twenty years of experience in this field, I have mentored men of all ages through the challenges they face at different stages of life. I work with men one to one providing a confidential and supportive space for exploration, reflections and growth.
I believe that until we take a look at the belief systems and behaviours that we’ve learnt whilst growing up, we often exist on a type of auto pilot, playing old ‘tapes’ and travelling in a particular direction but not necessarily understanding why or where we’re going. These old beliefs and ways of responding to situations, our partners and our children don’t always best serve us.
I will provide a confidential secure space where you are able to become curious about yourself, allowing you to get to know yourself better and discover your own truths at a pace that is comfortable for you. I work with individuals and couples one to one providing a confidential and supportive space for exploration, reflections and growth.
My way of working
Our work together can be short term or open ended, providing you continue to find it helpful. We start with an initial session where we get a chance to meet and for you to ask any questions you may have. After this, you can decide if you want to continue working with me and can book a series of sessions. I am happy to be flexible and although it is best to meet face to face, at least initially, I understand with the current times, if you prefer to meet and work virtually.
I am based at the City Therapy Rooms in Chancery Lane, London, EC4A 1JQ. For parenting, sessions can be in your home to make it easier if you have young children. I work virtually on Skype and on the telephone.
Psychotherapy Qualifications and Training:
- One year course in psychotherapy (Spectrum Psychotherapy – 2004)
- One year continuation course in psychotherapy (Spectrum Psychotherapy – 2005)
- Postgraduate course (Spectrum Psychotherapy – 2006)
- Postgraduate continuation group (Spectrum Psychotherapy – 2007 to 2012)
- Basic sexuality course (Spectrum Psychotherapy – 2006)
- Working with anger (Spectrum Psychotherapy – 1999)
- Working with groups (Spectrum Psychotherapy – 2009)
- Leader in The Mankind Project UK and Ireland (since 2009)
- Anger management training (British Association of Anger Management – 2007 to 2008)
For more about professional organisations & about what qualifications mean … Any Questions?
You can either call or email me. I’m happy to talk on the telephone about any concerns or questions you may have about the process.
Please contact me for my rates